Fear 2 (Looking Glass Self)

I had a dream last week with a machine that could show you how the world at large viewed your work. In reality, you can run your lyrics through different ideological lenses in search of perceived meaning, but you’re always just pretending to be the audience.

Empathy has it’s limits and you can never truly know how someone will view your work. You also will have a tendency to downplay any objections that paint you in an unfavorable light. The dream’s machine addresses those issues to give you a clear picture of how you’re being judged.

According to this dream machine I am:

Pretentious
Insensitive
and…
Nonsensical.

I found that to be a fairly accurate description of my work – Or, at least an accurate picture of the fears present in my creative process, (the greatest fear, of course, is the fear of being boring – nothing is worse than that).

Doubt can be overwhelming for an artist and it’s easy to find justifications to leave your work as is to avoid the feeling. Still, you should play these internal objections out to the end, because it will result in better work. Fear is very valuable in the creative process and will assist your search for the exact right word to describe your feelings. Unfortunately, (and often ironically,) what you consider the perfect words are often the exact wrong words (le mots mauvais,) for someone else. 

This is beyond your control and you can only bend to the will of the looking glass self so much before your work becomes derivative. You know your own experience better than you could know anyone else’s, so insight into the self is typically more novel. Even if others find your work pretentious, insensitive and nonsensical, rest easy knowing it was exactly what you wanted it to be.

Above is the rainy day lullaby “You” by Good Morning. Let the soft, lo-fi tones and lazy guitar lull you to sleep, confident in the belief that you are fine and no one is secretly judging you. (If anything they’re just ignoring you).

 

 

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